World Mental Health day: 10th October

Hey everyone! 

As today is World Mental Health day, I thought it would be the right time to discuss my mental health past on this blog. 

Within my past, I have certainly had a history with binge eating, and that has taken me some time to admit. I would always be given money from my mam and dad to pay for lunch at school, but it would not always go on food that would be a good meal. I got bullied a lot in school, and some days, it was harder to handle. I got bullied for several different things, such as: my weight, how I dressed and my natural hair too. I would usually leave school, get the bus home, and call into the local corner shop on my way home and spend what ever money I had left from lunch and buy as many sweets and chocolate as I could. I would then hide it in my bag and just eat the lot as soon as I was in my room. What I could not eat at the time, would be kept in a drawer so no one could see it. This was a habit that was so hard to break, but I am so glad that I am finally no longer a binge eater any more. 

At the age of 13, I was beginning to struggle with a lot of things in my life. I had a lot of bad news in my personal life, which I could not handle very well. The bullying at school was also at an awful point at this time of my life. I remember feeling so awful and crying myself to sleep most nights. I remember one night taking my parents to one side, and explaining how low I was. Seeing the reaction from them, how upset they were and how emotional they were that they did not see this at all. Since then, I wanted to make sure I would never be low again, and would always be open to the ones who I love and who care about me. Thankful these days, I have my amazing family always there to listen and Kyle (my amazing fiancee) is always there when ever I need to talk. 

I have also had therapy too, which has certainly been helpful. I would recommend anyone to try therapy if they feel that they need help. Personally, I was going through a stage of panic attacks and feel really ill (IBS loved my emotions at this point). This helped me massively with my low self esteem. I also had a car accident, which effected my mental health when in vehicles and also trying to learn to drive too. My goal is to go back to learning to drive, and I would love to do it one day! 

That is my mental health journey, please do not be alone in anything. There are people out there who love you and want to help you. Please look out for signs with loved ones and always be there for one another. 

xx