My Mental Health Journey so far & Where I am now?

Mental health is a huge part of life and the media at the moment, and it is something I have definitely got a history in. I have had symptoms of depression, as well as anxiety issues too. This is not a post that I am writing for people to feel sorry for me, I just want more people to be made aware of how it can affect different people. This is just my story so far.

If I look back at my history, I feel that my anxiety issues started when I was younger. Probably around when I was in secondary school. I was bullied quite a lot in school for several reasons, one of which was for my weight. I have always had problems with my weight, I will be going into my detail about this next week when I would like to blog about my health and fitness journey so far.

I was quite big in school (I thought), and it was the main thing that the bullies targeted me for. I hated going to school every day, and I know I felt anxious to go in. I would also try get as much time off as possible, pretty much always saying to my parents saying I was feeling unwell.

It started improving once I went to college, but then started again when I started working. When working within the fashion retail, while I loved it, I know it was not so good for my mental health. I would walk around the shops, doing the jobs that I needed to do. While doing this, I would always look at the mannequins as I past. This would make me feel conscious all the time, and it would make me know that I needed to lose weight to look PERFECT. Perfect is word that I feel like is too over used, and should not be at all. This is also another topic I wish to do in a separate blog post too.

As I have got older, which I am now 26 years old now. My anxiety has been mainly a concern die to how I feel about myself. Mainly, it happens when I know my self-esteem is low. Within this year, I have also started having anxiety attacks. And they are awful. Struggling to get my breath, panicking, thinking the worst in things, feeling like you have no control. It can be quite terrifying.

I have been to the doctors in past about my mental health, I have had counselling, as well as different therapists too. I feel that at the time of us, they were definitely helpful. Please do not feel like there is no end to mental health, someone will always be there to help and support you. Always consult a doctor, there were definitely a big help to me with my journey.

I hope this has been helpful for anyone, and just remember that you are not alone in any of this, there is someone always there. 

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